Ok, I haven't posted in a while and I feel like I have wanted to for so many things (i.e. last minute entry into the Baltimore half marathon for training, discovering Arlington Cemetery by foot, finally making it to the new MLK Jr. Memorial via a long run, etc). Maybe one day I will catch up BUT right now I need a safe space to say I am SO NERVOUS -- not for the race (well, ok that too, but not this second) but because I got sick two days ago and I am supposed to do my 20 mile run this weekend and I am scared that my stupid sickness is going to ruin my training.
This is probably the most important run in the whole training schedule -- it's the longest run you do before the race and then you taper for a few weeks. It's so important that it be this weekend, too, because you dont want it too close to the actual race. And running 20 miles on a monday or tuesday would just be crazypants. Crazypants, I tell you.
So, I worked from home today and drank a lot of tea and water and just tried not to move. Conserve energy and only get up to pee. What's so crazy to me is that yesterday morning I wasn't feeling so hot but I still managed to get a nice run of 10 miles in. How can our bodies manage that?! So maybe even if I am not feeling awesome on Sunday (already pushed this from Saturday to Sunday... but it's also maybe supposed to SNOW in DC on Saturday and be beautiful on Sunday, so that's a no-brainer anyway) then I will still be able to do it? And just be sick a few more days as a result... BUT get the run in? Do I sound like an addict right now? I need to get this run in!
Maybe the bright side of all of this is that my sickly body is actually getting me to BEG to do a 20 mile run. Rather than fear it or dread it, I just honestly hope that I can be healthy enough to do it!
I've got about 60 hours. Please send vitamin C thoughts and zinc dreams my way!
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head... and sneakers
I normally avoid running in the rain; it's one of the reasons I have a gym membership. On Friday, however, I needed to do a 15 mile run and it was raining and there was no way I was doing 15 miles on a treadmill -- a girl needs some standards. And because of scheduling conflicts, I couldn't put this run off. In the back of my mind I knew that running in bad weather was a necessary evil. After all, what if it rained on race day? I needed to know I could power through, even in less than ideal conditions.
So after weather.com assured me once again that it was not going to stop raining for the rest of the day, I laced up for what was going to be my longest run ever and my first experience with rain running. Water belt: check. ipod in plastic baggie: check. Waterproof headphones: check. Baseball cap to keep rain out of my face: check. Route mapped out: check. Could everything on my person get wet and would I still survive? yes and yes. And so I was off.
The first few miles were pretty nice. I actually found that since I was concentrating on the rain, I wasn't thinking much about running and so the distance sort of melted away. It also turns out that the rain feels pretty nice when you're running, especially in humidity. I ran along Rock Creek Park and down past Watergate at which point the trail opens up and the Potomac appears on your right. I watched the rain hit the water's surface; an uninterrupted downpour of grey on murkier grey. I passed the Lincoln Memorial and the brave tourists with their umbrellas and their cameras. I passed the Korean War Memorial with the troop of hunched soldiers in their heavy ponchos and was reminded that there are much more challenging things than running. That monument always gives me chills.
Every time the rare runner passed I felt a sense of camaraderie; we're both braving this weather to run! We're both sopping wet! We're hardcore! Of course, it wouldn't really be fair to call myself hardcore at this point -- I never run in the rain. These people passing me probably ran in the rain all the time. Weather probably meant nothing to them. They laughed in the face of weather. If there was a way to eat weather for breakfast, these people probably did it as a pre-race snack. I was an impostor, pretending to be a part of their hardcore, weather-eating club when this was in fact my inaugural race. I was accustomed to oatmeal!
By mile 10 the rain was coming down a lot harder and the puddles were getting bigger and I knew that I could either duck out now and finish at the gym or, because of my route, be committed to finishing the last few miles in the storm. Maybe it was a lame decision, but I opted to finish on the treadmill. I felt confident that 10+ miles in the rain were adequate to prove to myself that I could do it and honestly, I was just completely soaked - sneakers, pants, hat - the works. So I finished my run at the gym and then ran back home. And I felt good! The last few miles were tough and my legs were definitely tired, but this was one of the first runs where I have started to feel like I can actually reach 26.2 miles. Maybe it was crossing the half-marathon point and getting closer to the length of the full race. Or maybe it was that even at 10 miles in, I still felt pretty strong. In any case, my rain run gave me more confidence going forward and made me feel good about training (I had sort of started getting nervous and psyching myself out a little, and I know that that is a big danger with distance running). I feel good knowing I have almost 2 months till the race and things are on track. Oh god, a track -- can you imagine running 15 on a track? 60 laps. SIXTY. Maybe rain isn't so bad after all.
So after weather.com assured me once again that it was not going to stop raining for the rest of the day, I laced up for what was going to be my longest run ever and my first experience with rain running. Water belt: check. ipod in plastic baggie: check. Waterproof headphones: check. Baseball cap to keep rain out of my face: check. Route mapped out: check. Could everything on my person get wet and would I still survive? yes and yes. And so I was off.
The first few miles were pretty nice. I actually found that since I was concentrating on the rain, I wasn't thinking much about running and so the distance sort of melted away. It also turns out that the rain feels pretty nice when you're running, especially in humidity. I ran along Rock Creek Park and down past Watergate at which point the trail opens up and the Potomac appears on your right. I watched the rain hit the water's surface; an uninterrupted downpour of grey on murkier grey. I passed the Lincoln Memorial and the brave tourists with their umbrellas and their cameras. I passed the Korean War Memorial with the troop of hunched soldiers in their heavy ponchos and was reminded that there are much more challenging things than running. That monument always gives me chills.
Every time the rare runner passed I felt a sense of camaraderie; we're both braving this weather to run! We're both sopping wet! We're hardcore! Of course, it wouldn't really be fair to call myself hardcore at this point -- I never run in the rain. These people passing me probably ran in the rain all the time. Weather probably meant nothing to them. They laughed in the face of weather. If there was a way to eat weather for breakfast, these people probably did it as a pre-race snack. I was an impostor, pretending to be a part of their hardcore, weather-eating club when this was in fact my inaugural race. I was accustomed to oatmeal!
By mile 10 the rain was coming down a lot harder and the puddles were getting bigger and I knew that I could either duck out now and finish at the gym or, because of my route, be committed to finishing the last few miles in the storm. Maybe it was a lame decision, but I opted to finish on the treadmill. I felt confident that 10+ miles in the rain were adequate to prove to myself that I could do it and honestly, I was just completely soaked - sneakers, pants, hat - the works. So I finished my run at the gym and then ran back home. And I felt good! The last few miles were tough and my legs were definitely tired, but this was one of the first runs where I have started to feel like I can actually reach 26.2 miles. Maybe it was crossing the half-marathon point and getting closer to the length of the full race. Or maybe it was that even at 10 miles in, I still felt pretty strong. In any case, my rain run gave me more confidence going forward and made me feel good about training (I had sort of started getting nervous and psyching myself out a little, and I know that that is a big danger with distance running). I feel good knowing I have almost 2 months till the race and things are on track. Oh god, a track -- can you imagine running 15 on a track? 60 laps. SIXTY. Maybe rain isn't so bad after all.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Destination San Diego Half Marathon
Yesterday I ran a half marathon. I am still having a little trouble digesting this fact because it was such a non-event, in comparison to the two other times I have ever run that distance. I've run the Philadelphia Half Marathon in 2009 and in 2010 and so my past experiences running a full 13.1 miles have been comprised of big crowds, crisp temperatures, commemorative shirts, thousands of other runners, and adrenaline. Sweet, sweet adrenaline. And then at the end, you get a medal! And a banana! And other such food that your recovering body craves! You take pictures and revel in that post-race glow and marvel that your legs have stopped moving for the first time in 2+ hours. You get a free massage, for god's sake.
My run yesterday, in comparison, was just a training run. And in some ways it was a special one because I'm in San Diego visiting a good friend and was able to plot a course that took me through Balboa Park and along the Pacific Ocean and then -- and this was weird -- past the San Diego Airport (a necessary course to get to Harbor Island Drive Park, but a pretty boring stretch). I got to explore a city by foot, which is one of my favorite ways of seeing a place. But it was 13.1 miles that were largely alone, especially because this run was on a Monday, when most of the rest of the world is at work. By the last 3 miles I was running along a touristy section of Harbor Drive. My legs were burning and feeling the ache as I dodged the tourists and pedicabs. When I squeezed my fists I could feel the salt build-up, the grittiness upon my skin a sign that my body knew this was serious. But to the tourists taking up the whole damn promenade (cause let's face it -- it's not fun to admit, but by this point I was silently cursing anyone in my path whom I had to run around and expend any more energy than was necessary to get to the finish -- those inconsiderate bastards!!) I was just another runner out for a nice morning jog.
Really, it doesn't usually matter to me how people consider me when I'm on a run. Part of what I like about running is clearing my head and using the time to push my body according to my own limits -- it's not about competing with others in any way. I have been forever scarred by being the slowest runner on my High School track team and now I run against myself and no one else. But in comparison to the last 3 miles of a big race, my final miles yesterday felt anticlimactic and almost alienating. When I reached the end, I stopped my Nike+ tracker and Lance Armstrong's voice came on, congratulating me on "my longest run yet!" (note: this is because it registered as 13.11 for some reason instead of 13.10. This was not purposeful, believe me. If I could have run .01 less, it would have happened). But aside from Lance, there was nothing. Tourists kept milling about, none of them holding congratulatory signs, none of them even giving me a banana. I walked up the hill to my friend's apartment, stretched, showered, and ate some crackers with peanut butter. No medal. No free massage. I still felt like I accomplished something, but this time my run was not the goal in and of itself. It was just a step on my way towards running twice that distance. I should mention that while Lance was talking to me post-run, I had the terrifying thought that "in just over two months you are planning on running double that amount." DOUBLE. Later, in the shower, I thought "Yup, you'd still be running now." Lying on the couch even later I started to have the same thought and quickly pushed it out of my mind. I know that training for a marathon is part physical but also part mental. So freaking myself out is not the way to accomplish this goal. Bad Lauren. Bad. Instead, I guess I just need to remember that running 13.1 miles, with or without an official race, is a big deal for me and I should feel great about that. And that I have a whole 10 weeks left to get to the 26.2. And it's going to be okay. It has to be. I mean, with Lance on my side, how can I not do this?
My run yesterday, in comparison, was just a training run. And in some ways it was a special one because I'm in San Diego visiting a good friend and was able to plot a course that took me through Balboa Park and along the Pacific Ocean and then -- and this was weird -- past the San Diego Airport (a necessary course to get to Harbor Island Drive Park, but a pretty boring stretch). I got to explore a city by foot, which is one of my favorite ways of seeing a place. But it was 13.1 miles that were largely alone, especially because this run was on a Monday, when most of the rest of the world is at work. By the last 3 miles I was running along a touristy section of Harbor Drive. My legs were burning and feeling the ache as I dodged the tourists and pedicabs. When I squeezed my fists I could feel the salt build-up, the grittiness upon my skin a sign that my body knew this was serious. But to the tourists taking up the whole damn promenade (cause let's face it -- it's not fun to admit, but by this point I was silently cursing anyone in my path whom I had to run around and expend any more energy than was necessary to get to the finish -- those inconsiderate bastards!!) I was just another runner out for a nice morning jog.
Really, it doesn't usually matter to me how people consider me when I'm on a run. Part of what I like about running is clearing my head and using the time to push my body according to my own limits -- it's not about competing with others in any way. I have been forever scarred by being the slowest runner on my High School track team and now I run against myself and no one else. But in comparison to the last 3 miles of a big race, my final miles yesterday felt anticlimactic and almost alienating. When I reached the end, I stopped my Nike+ tracker and Lance Armstrong's voice came on, congratulating me on "my longest run yet!" (note: this is because it registered as 13.11 for some reason instead of 13.10. This was not purposeful, believe me. If I could have run .01 less, it would have happened). But aside from Lance, there was nothing. Tourists kept milling about, none of them holding congratulatory signs, none of them even giving me a banana. I walked up the hill to my friend's apartment, stretched, showered, and ate some crackers with peanut butter. No medal. No free massage. I still felt like I accomplished something, but this time my run was not the goal in and of itself. It was just a step on my way towards running twice that distance. I should mention that while Lance was talking to me post-run, I had the terrifying thought that "in just over two months you are planning on running double that amount." DOUBLE. Later, in the shower, I thought "Yup, you'd still be running now." Lying on the couch even later I started to have the same thought and quickly pushed it out of my mind. I know that training for a marathon is part physical but also part mental. So freaking myself out is not the way to accomplish this goal. Bad Lauren. Bad. Instead, I guess I just need to remember that running 13.1 miles, with or without an official race, is a big deal for me and I should feel great about that. And that I have a whole 10 weeks left to get to the 26.2. And it's going to be okay. It has to be. I mean, with Lance on my side, how can I not do this?
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Iron Man and Air Conditioning
An unfortunate reality of training during the summer is the heat; the sticky, sweaty, stuffy heat of D.C. that even at 6:00 in the morning is too much for a girl like me to handle. So for the summer months, I keep to the treadmill.
Pluses of the treadmill:
Minuses of the treadmill:
If I was a bigger person -- and a less sweaty one, at that -- perhaps I could convince myself to run outside at least half of the time. But this is D.C. and I am a heat wimp and so for the time being, I am relegated to my deluxe hamster wheel. Which brings me to my next point and a plea for help:
If I am running long distances on the treadmill and I need to fight that messed up law of physics, I need some form of distraction or entertainment. I tried watching The Office this weekend on a 7 mile run but it doesn't get me going the way a good Girl Talk tune does. You know what did work pretty well though? Iron Man 2. There were explosions, there was action, there was a terrifying Mickey Rourke with scary electrical-whip death weapons. Plus the plot was pretty good for a superhero sequel! Heart rate goes up --> legs go faster --> run goes more quickly. Everybody wins. Of course, I found myself contemplating torts and who would be liable for the mass destruction inflicted throughout the film (pretty sure Hammer is vicariously liable for hiring Ivan... though the military hired Hammer... within Hammer's scope of duty to hire Ivan? Hmmmm) but that is another post for another time.
The important lesson I learned from Iron Man 2 is that I need to ditch the indie films and the dramas and the rom-coms for the time being, and focus on Netflix's "action & adventure" and "suspense" suggestions. Given that I almost watched Step Up 3 the other day in search of an adrenaline fix, I need some help with this. Does anyone have any good movie recommendations of action/adventure films that are not totally brainless and are exciting to watch? No blood and gore, please!
Thanks for the help!
Pluses of the treadmill:
- A.C. And this plus cannot be emphasized enough.
- The little fan on the treadmill that cools my face so nicely. It's really quite nice.
- Treadmill Bonuses: watching the Daily Show, Colbert Report, and various movies on my phone. Sometimes even watching bad music videos on the TV hooked up to my machine. A good Britney video can do wonders for your running pace.
Minuses of the treadmill:
- The monotony.
- Law of physics: Time spent running goes, at a minimum, 2.3x slower when on a treadmill than when on the street.
- No new places to discover, no new routes to explore
- listening to music can get old quickly (where as running outside I am great with my running playlists)
- Did I mention the *!?&ing monotony??????
- staring at those damn numbers in front of you rather than at trees. Stop taunting me with your skewed sense of time, you stupid treadmill!
If I was a bigger person -- and a less sweaty one, at that -- perhaps I could convince myself to run outside at least half of the time. But this is D.C. and I am a heat wimp and so for the time being, I am relegated to my deluxe hamster wheel. Which brings me to my next point and a plea for help:
If I am running long distances on the treadmill and I need to fight that messed up law of physics, I need some form of distraction or entertainment. I tried watching The Office this weekend on a 7 mile run but it doesn't get me going the way a good Girl Talk tune does. You know what did work pretty well though? Iron Man 2. There were explosions, there was action, there was a terrifying Mickey Rourke with scary electrical-whip death weapons. Plus the plot was pretty good for a superhero sequel! Heart rate goes up --> legs go faster --> run goes more quickly. Everybody wins. Of course, I found myself contemplating torts and who would be liable for the mass destruction inflicted throughout the film (pretty sure Hammer is vicariously liable for hiring Ivan... though the military hired Hammer... within Hammer's scope of duty to hire Ivan? Hmmmm) but that is another post for another time.
The important lesson I learned from Iron Man 2 is that I need to ditch the indie films and the dramas and the rom-coms for the time being, and focus on Netflix's "action & adventure" and "suspense" suggestions. Given that I almost watched Step Up 3 the other day in search of an adrenaline fix, I need some help with this. Does anyone have any good movie recommendations of action/adventure films that are not totally brainless and are exciting to watch? No blood and gore, please!
Thanks for the help!
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
A real summer and a really big goal
As of next week, it will have been a full year since I endured the satanic ritual all law school graduates must succumb to if they have any hope of actually practicing law after graduating with three years worth of law school debt.* One full year! Sometimes I find myself referring to "last summer" and catching myself because I'm actually referencing the summer of 2009; not the summer of 2010. The summer of 2010 was a blur, and not really a summer, in the proper sense, at all.
Was it hot? Yes.
Was there sunshine in the fields and meadows? Yes.
Was there sunshine in my heart? No. No there was not. Terror did a pretty bang-up job of keeping the mnemonics in and the sunshine out. May, June, and July of 2010 might have technically happened, but they were not my months; they belonged to Barbri and the New York Board of Law Examiners, joint tenants of my soul (and terrible renters, I might add).
Since that dark period, I moved out of Philly, moved down to DC, became a morning runner, went back up to Philly to run a half marathon, broke my ankle, recovered from said broken ankle, and learned that if you ever get divorced you should really try everything possible to avoid litigating that mess (note: I did not get divorced. I did, however, work--and still work--for a judge who handles many divorce trials. And they are not pretty. A painful divorce is one of those things that I believe must be worse than the bar exam... so there's some perspective for you future-bar-takers, I suppose.)
And now, now, I'm training for a marathon. My first. My first time running anything more than 13.1 miles. I'm nervous that my body won't hold up, that four months is a long time for nothing to go wrong, that once I start my job as an associate in October I won't find time for my long weekday runs, that training will take over my life, and that at mile 25.5 I might collapse on the streets of Philadelphia (la-la-la la-la-la la).
But I'm also really freaking excited. And I'm excited to write about it all here. And at the end of the day, I feel like if I can get through studying for the bar exam, I can run 26.2 miles... right?
Right.
* Except if you went to law school in Wisconsin and plan on staying there. You jerks.
Was it hot? Yes.
Was there sunshine in the fields and meadows? Yes.
Was there sunshine in my heart? No. No there was not. Terror did a pretty bang-up job of keeping the mnemonics in and the sunshine out. May, June, and July of 2010 might have technically happened, but they were not my months; they belonged to Barbri and the New York Board of Law Examiners, joint tenants of my soul (and terrible renters, I might add).
Since that dark period, I moved out of Philly, moved down to DC, became a morning runner, went back up to Philly to run a half marathon, broke my ankle, recovered from said broken ankle, and learned that if you ever get divorced you should really try everything possible to avoid litigating that mess (note: I did not get divorced. I did, however, work--and still work--for a judge who handles many divorce trials. And they are not pretty. A painful divorce is one of those things that I believe must be worse than the bar exam... so there's some perspective for you future-bar-takers, I suppose.)
And now, now, I'm training for a marathon. My first. My first time running anything more than 13.1 miles. I'm nervous that my body won't hold up, that four months is a long time for nothing to go wrong, that once I start my job as an associate in October I won't find time for my long weekday runs, that training will take over my life, and that at mile 25.5 I might collapse on the streets of Philadelphia (la-la-la la-la-la la).
But I'm also really freaking excited. And I'm excited to write about it all here. And at the end of the day, I feel like if I can get through studying for the bar exam, I can run 26.2 miles... right?
Right.
* Except if you went to law school in Wisconsin and plan on staying there. You jerks.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Reasons I actually MISS law school
Over the 3 years of law school, one of my common refrains was that I looked forward to finally having my nights and weekends back once I got back to the real world of having a job and having a real-person life. Now that I am living the dream, so to speak, I find myself wishing for the student's schedule once again. I know. The grass is always greener, right?
I realize that most of these things I say I miss about law school are in reality things I miss about the graduate student's life: flexibility, freedom, using my own laptop to do work. That sort of thing. Don't get me wrong - I love, love, LOVE my nights and my weekends. The freedom of my Sundays is almost overwhelming. I'm not going to say I WANT work on these Sundays but I will say I am still trying to figure out how to deal with such glorious unscheduled chunks of free time. Reading things can no longer be called "work" - it's purely for pleasure. This is great... just a little unnerving. And this just makes me realize what a law student [read: type-A nerd] I truly became in those 3 years. It's gonna take some work to undo the damage, but I am committed to the project. Until then, I thought it would be a good exercise to compile a list of things I miss about my former life:
I realize that most of these things I say I miss about law school are in reality things I miss about the graduate student's life: flexibility, freedom, using my own laptop to do work. That sort of thing. Don't get me wrong - I love, love, LOVE my nights and my weekends. The freedom of my Sundays is almost overwhelming. I'm not going to say I WANT work on these Sundays but I will say I am still trying to figure out how to deal with such glorious unscheduled chunks of free time. Reading things can no longer be called "work" - it's purely for pleasure. This is great... just a little unnerving. And this just makes me realize what a law student [read: type-A nerd] I truly became in those 3 years. It's gonna take some work to undo the damage, but I am committed to the project. Until then, I thought it would be a good exercise to compile a list of things I miss about my former life:
- The internet. Good lord, how I miss the internet. It's way less acceptable to procrastinate at my job, on the taxpayer's dime, than on my own time when being distracted by feministing and dcist and sociological images just meant I would need to work a little later into the evening. I miss blogs and linking through continuously until I really was not sure how I got there, but I was so happy I had made it to say, this. Sure, I still have the weekend to catch up, but it's not the same. I feel like I was in a pretty serious relationship and one of us now works in a different city and we can only spend time together on the weekends. It's been rough. I'm still committed, but I just hope he doesn't take my lack of attention personally....
- Running in the afternoons. The crisp fall air. The leaves turning color. Seeing the faces of other runners. My morning runs which are often in the dark are just not the same. I still love them, but I don't get to savor them as much as I got to savor my late-afternoon, pre-dinner runs. This is only going to get worse as it gets colder too and 6am briskness becomes 6am frigidness.
- Food Shopping at 8am... on a Monday. There is nothing in the world like a fully-stocked, almost empty Trader Joe's. Nothing.
- Coffee and Breakfast at Home. I miss leisurely mornings where I would wake up early, make coffee, and work from home for a couple of hours before heading to school. Drinking out of an actual mug; having time for some cereal. I still have coffee and oatmeal at work, but there is something about enjoying it in the comfort of home that made mornings lovely.
I am sure I will think of more things. I will also say that I do miss the sense of community at law school and the constant and varied intellectual pursuits in which I could surround myself. But at least that I can try to replicate in other ways now. Figuring out a way to sneak out of work at 4pm for a run... probably not going to happen.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Why we need to write things down
In Contracts class we learned that some contracts require a writing to be enforced and others don't (statute of frauds). There's a lengthy list of what needs a writing and what does not, but one of the main things to remember is that if a contract can be completed within one year, then it is not within the statute (this is for performance contracts... if you contract to buy goods it's a different story, but that's another rousing tale for another time).
So if performance can't be completed within one year from when the agreement was made, the agreement needs a writing. It doesn't matter if it ends up taking more than a year - it just matters if it was theoretically possible. In my book, there is a special bullet for "lifetime contracts." As in "I employ you for the rest of your life." Does that need to be in writing?
In the state of New York, yes! Write it down!!
But on the multi-state exam, nope! And why is this, you wonder???????
Oh, here's the explanation:
"A contract measured by a lifetime (e.g. a promise to 'employ until I die' or 'work until I die') is not within the Statute because it is capable of performance within a year since a person can die at any time."
Thanks a lot, contract law. Like any of us need reminders that life is short and time is precious when we're stuck inside reading about contract law. I hate you.
So if performance can't be completed within one year from when the agreement was made, the agreement needs a writing. It doesn't matter if it ends up taking more than a year - it just matters if it was theoretically possible. In my book, there is a special bullet for "lifetime contracts." As in "I employ you for the rest of your life." Does that need to be in writing?
In the state of New York, yes! Write it down!!
But on the multi-state exam, nope! And why is this, you wonder???????
Oh, here's the explanation:
"A contract measured by a lifetime (e.g. a promise to 'employ until I die' or 'work until I die') is not within the Statute because it is capable of performance within a year since a person can die at any time."
Thanks a lot, contract law. Like any of us need reminders that life is short and time is precious when we're stuck inside reading about contract law. I hate you.
Future Attorneys of America: Peeing themselves with excitement
If ever I thought I was a little crazy with preparing the bar, I learned something yesterday that made me feel a lot better. Not so much about what I am doing, but rather what I am NOT doing. And that, my friends, is wearing diapers.
Yesterday morning I was speaking with one the associate directors of Barbri before class began. We were discussing the terrible bathroom situation at the testing site and how there inevitably always really long lines. I mentioned my plan to just not drink any water during the exam and rehydrate afterwards. The associate director laughed.
"Every year, we get calls to our office asking about the bathroom situation," he confided. "And every year, people ask if it's okay if they wear diapers during the exam. Yes, it's okay, we tell them, but it's certainly not respectful to your neighbors."
DIAPERS.
Future lawyers are taking the bar exam while literally peeing themselves and then sitting in it for the rest of the exam. Seriously.
You can't bring your cell phone into the testing facility but you can bring your Depends??!? The bar exam is insane.
Yesterday morning I was speaking with one the associate directors of Barbri before class began. We were discussing the terrible bathroom situation at the testing site and how there inevitably always really long lines. I mentioned my plan to just not drink any water during the exam and rehydrate afterwards. The associate director laughed.
"Every year, we get calls to our office asking about the bathroom situation," he confided. "And every year, people ask if it's okay if they wear diapers during the exam. Yes, it's okay, we tell them, but it's certainly not respectful to your neighbors."
DIAPERS.
Future lawyers are taking the bar exam while literally peeing themselves and then sitting in it for the rest of the exam. Seriously.
You can't bring your cell phone into the testing facility but you can bring your Depends??!? The bar exam is insane.
DO NOT WANT!
In case the meaning image is not clear, the kitten is me. The evil dinosaur chew toy attacking the poor kitten is the NY bar. This is stressing the kitten out. Poor kitten.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
One of these things is not like the other
I was typing up my Evidence notes today and in an effort to have lots of info fit onto small flashcards, I tend to abbreviate many words. Evidence --> ev, Admissible --> admiss, etc.
Microsoft Word normally lets me get away with these things. Yes, it underlines the offending words in red, as if I need reminders that opp and req and crim aren't real words, but whatever. It happens.
Today, however, I typed in ctroom, my shorthand for Courtroom. And what did Word not simply underline in red but autocorrect it to?
Cathouse.
Not the same, Word, not the same. Though it would change the face of American jurisprudence... and other parts as well, I guess ;)
Microsoft Word normally lets me get away with these things. Yes, it underlines the offending words in red, as if I need reminders that opp and req and crim aren't real words, but whatever. It happens.
Today, however, I typed in ctroom, my shorthand for Courtroom. And what did Word not simply underline in red but autocorrect it to?
Cathouse.
Not the same, Word, not the same. Though it would change the face of American jurisprudence... and other parts as well, I guess ;)
Monday, June 21, 2010
Naptime?
As Beyonce so aptly put it, "if I were a booooyyyyy"
Think there is some sort of equivalent for the lady folk out there who want the occasional library nap? Please advise.
Think there is some sort of equivalent for the lady folk out there who want the occasional library nap? Please advise.
trick or treat?
I have some really great friends. A couple of them visited the other weekend from New York and brought with them a big box of goodies, each individually wrapped in tissue paper; one for me to open every day of bar study. Is that the best, or what? So far I have gotten a lot of awesome loot (coupon for coffee, chocolate, tissues (for crying when I break down?), bubbles, mini bottle of absolute, etc) but today's present made me laugh out loud.
I unwrapped the tissue paper and found a small box, roughly the size of a coaster. On the front it says "help: I have an aching body." And on the back is the best drug warning I have ever read. It states "This is ibuprofen. It isn't a sweet candy treat. We wouldn't try to trick you by coating it with sugar."
Amazing. Thanks, friends :)
I unwrapped the tissue paper and found a small box, roughly the size of a coaster. On the front it says "help: I have an aching body." And on the back is the best drug warning I have ever read. It states "This is ibuprofen. It isn't a sweet candy treat. We wouldn't try to trick you by coating it with sugar."
Amazing. Thanks, friends :)
Sunday, June 20, 2010
I pity the fool who writes multiple choice questions
This is a question I just encountered in practice multiple choice questions on criminal law. If you're really clever, you too will figure out who these characters are supposed to be. Way to go, Barbri, injecting "humor" into our weekend. This makes everything much better and I don't hate the bar anymore!
False. That was a lie. Did you spot it? Nice work. That reminds me: we need more (read: any) T/F questions on this exam. Mr. T and Chuck Norris may be amusing but they don't give me a 50/50 shot of getting questions right.
For your legal reasoning pleasure:
Chuck Chan, a martial arts master and renowned actor, was at a bar with several friends when he saw another renowned actor, Mr. R. For several weeks, Mr. R had been calling Chuck a "fool" and other derogatory names because Chuck had been cast in several made for TV movies that Mr. R had also auditioned for. In addition, Mr. R was insanely jealous of Chuck's critical acclaim and unfathomable popularity. In this spirit, Mr. R approached Chuck and claimed carnal relations with Chuck's mother, sister, and girlfriend. Chuck, clearly enraged, leapt off of his bar stool and stormed from the bar toward his apartment, which was several blocks away. Mr. R followed for several blocks, yelling obscenities, all the way to Chuck's apartment building. Infuriated by Mr. R's barrage of insults, Chuck delivered a sudden and forceful round house kick to Mr. R's chest as soon as the pair entered the lobby. Mr. R fell backward, slammed his head on the marble floor, and died on the way to the hospital.
Assuming the facts as stated, which of the following best reflects the crime for which Chuck Chan may be convicted?
(a) Second degree murder
(b) First degree manslaughter
(c) Second degree manslaughter
(d) No crime because the lobby was part of his dwelling, so Chuck Chan was not under a duty to retreat
...Ok. after re-reading it, that IS pretty funny. Especially the carnal relations with Chuck's mom, sister, and girlfriend. But "unfathomable popularity"? I beg to differ, Barbri.
False. That was a lie. Did you spot it? Nice work. That reminds me: we need more (read: any) T/F questions on this exam. Mr. T and Chuck Norris may be amusing but they don't give me a 50/50 shot of getting questions right.
For your legal reasoning pleasure:
Chuck Chan, a martial arts master and renowned actor, was at a bar with several friends when he saw another renowned actor, Mr. R. For several weeks, Mr. R had been calling Chuck a "fool" and other derogatory names because Chuck had been cast in several made for TV movies that Mr. R had also auditioned for. In addition, Mr. R was insanely jealous of Chuck's critical acclaim and unfathomable popularity. In this spirit, Mr. R approached Chuck and claimed carnal relations with Chuck's mother, sister, and girlfriend. Chuck, clearly enraged, leapt off of his bar stool and stormed from the bar toward his apartment, which was several blocks away. Mr. R followed for several blocks, yelling obscenities, all the way to Chuck's apartment building. Infuriated by Mr. R's barrage of insults, Chuck delivered a sudden and forceful round house kick to Mr. R's chest as soon as the pair entered the lobby. Mr. R fell backward, slammed his head on the marble floor, and died on the way to the hospital.
Assuming the facts as stated, which of the following best reflects the crime for which Chuck Chan may be convicted?
(a) Second degree murder
(b) First degree manslaughter
(c) Second degree manslaughter
(d) No crime because the lobby was part of his dwelling, so Chuck Chan was not under a duty to retreat
...Ok. after re-reading it, that IS pretty funny. Especially the carnal relations with Chuck's mom, sister, and girlfriend. But "unfathomable popularity"? I beg to differ, Barbri.
Race to the Finish
Some definitions:
implode |imˈplōd|: verbcollapse or cause to collapse violently inward :[ intrans. ] the windows on both sides of the room had imploded [ trans. ] : these forces would implode the pellet to a density 100 times higher than that of lead.explode |ikˈsplōd|: verbburst or shatter violently and noisily as a result of rapid combustion, decomposition, excessive internal pressure, or other process, typically scattering fragments widely : a large bomb exploded in a park.• [ trans. ] cause (a bomb) to do this : the USSR had not yet exploded its first nuclear weapon.• technical undergo a violent expansion in which much energy is released as a shock wave : lead ensures that gasoline burns rather than explodes.• (of a person) suddenly give expression to violent and uncontainable emotion, esp. anger : he can explode with anger | [withdirect speech ] “This is ludicrous!” she exploded.
The question is, which is more likely to happen to my brain first? My vote is with explosion. Though I think the dictionary has it wrong when it implies that explosion of a person can only be expressive. Let my brain soon be a case study for Webster's. At least it will do someone out there some good.
implode |imˈplōd|: verbcollapse or cause to collapse violently inward :[ intrans. ] the windows on both sides of the room had imploded [ trans. ] : these forces would implode the pellet to a density 100 times higher than that of lead.explode |ikˈsplōd|: verbburst or shatter violently and noisily as a result of rapid combustion, decomposition, excessive internal pressure, or other process, typically scattering fragments widely : a large bomb exploded in a park.• [ trans. ] cause (a bomb) to do this : the USSR had not yet exploded its first nuclear weapon.• technical undergo a violent expansion in which much energy is released as a shock wave : lead ensures that gasoline burns rather than explodes.• (of a person) suddenly give expression to violent and uncontainable emotion, esp. anger : he can explode with anger | [withdirect speech ] “This is ludicrous!” she exploded.
The question is, which is more likely to happen to my brain first? My vote is with explosion. Though I think the dictionary has it wrong when it implies that explosion of a person can only be expressive. Let my brain soon be a case study for Webster's. At least it will do someone out there some good.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
To speak with a customer service representative, press AHHHH
On Friday night my friend and I got together for an evening of indian take out and NY practice review. At 9:15 I got a call from a 212 number I didn't recognize.
"Hello??"
"Hi, this is Christine, your Barbri representative. This is just a courtesy call to see how everything is going. How are you?"
(laughter on my end, maybe confusing Christine)
"I'm... ok," I answered.
"Can I help you with anything?" asked Christine, ever so friendly.
"Like, with law?" I inquired hopefully.
"Um, no. Not with law. But can I help you with something else?"
"Oh... no. that's ok. Thank you anyway though."
"Ok. Have a good night!!"
I wonder if Christine is a law student, a lawyer, or a future law student, and whether her job has scared her away from ever going to law school. I also wonder how many other people have simply laughed when she asked if there was any way she could help. Thanks for sort of being there, barbri. Good to know that money is going somewhere...
"Hello??"
"Hi, this is Christine, your Barbri representative. This is just a courtesy call to see how everything is going. How are you?"
(laughter on my end, maybe confusing Christine)
"I'm... ok," I answered.
"Can I help you with anything?" asked Christine, ever so friendly.
"Like, with law?" I inquired hopefully.
"Um, no. Not with law. But can I help you with something else?"
"Oh... no. that's ok. Thank you anyway though."
"Ok. Have a good night!!"
I wonder if Christine is a law student, a lawyer, or a future law student, and whether her job has scared her away from ever going to law school. I also wonder how many other people have simply laughed when she asked if there was any way she could help. Thanks for sort of being there, barbri. Good to know that money is going somewhere...
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Crayola dreams and contract nights
In the spring of my junior year of High School I took an advanced art class that I loved. My teacher was lovely and at the end of the semester encouraged me to apply to art school. "RISD!" she exclaimed. "Or Parsons!"
"Hmm, I like art," I remember thinking to myself, "but I should really go to college and have some sort of profession... I can always do art on the side..."
Fast forward eleven years into the future. Scene: bleary eyed Barbri student hunched over flashcards on a Saturday evening, drawing pictures of various forms of incapacitated persons in order to remember contract law; using colored markers to label outlines and getting way too much satisfaction out of color-coding with washable markers. Art is so nice. So pretty. Where oh where did I go wrong?
"Hmm, I like art," I remember thinking to myself, "but I should really go to college and have some sort of profession... I can always do art on the side..."
Fast forward eleven years into the future. Scene: bleary eyed Barbri student hunched over flashcards on a Saturday evening, drawing pictures of various forms of incapacitated persons in order to remember contract law; using colored markers to label outlines and getting way too much satisfaction out of color-coding with washable markers. Art is so nice. So pretty. Where oh where did I go wrong?
Regrets: I haz em
Behind the Bar(s)
My new favorite study haunt this summer is a coffee shop called Mugshots. Lots of sitting space, cozy feel, public radio playing, lots of veggie snack options - basically just wondering why I haven't moved in sooner! The name "Mugshots" is especially clever given that the shop sits right across the street from the Eastern State Penitentiary, "America's Most Historic Prison." It closed in 1970 but still, as you sit drinking your fair trade coffee, you can see the penitentiary's massive walls out the window. It's actually a beautiful structure.... until a sinking feeling hits you and you realize the cruel, cruel irony of the fact that your favorite place to study for the bar is right outside a freaking prison. Summer of hell, you are upon me.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Mnemonic Fail
For those unfamiliar with freedom of religion law, there's basically one magic Amendment (the First) and two magic clauses: the free exercise clause and the establishment clause. Today in Barbri we were going over these clauses in about 5 minutes. Which, I should mention, was a very different experience from my semester-long course on the two clauses (Church & State), but who's bringing little things like THAT up when the professor starts the lecture by advising you not to question or basically think for yourself in this area of the exam because the bar examiners don't like that and aren't looking for controversy, so just write down what he says and smile.
He goes over the free exercise clause in about 30 seconds (sorry, religion!) and then moved on to the three-part test for the Establishment Clause, which he had a handy little mnemonic for: SEX.
1. S - a Secular purpose for the law is required
2. E - the primary Effect must be neither to advance nor inhibit religion, and
3. X - there must not be eXcessive government entanglement with religion.
In typing up my notes later I tried to come up with a way to associate sex with the establishment clause. Sadly, I realized that the professor had squandered the mnemonic on the wrong clause. Sex = free exercise!
However, I think there's still a link for the legitimate clause. It just came to me! AND it's actually appropriate for my feelings towards the bar: Fuck the Establishment.
That's right, New York bar examiners - I'm talking to you.
He goes over the free exercise clause in about 30 seconds (sorry, religion!) and then moved on to the three-part test for the Establishment Clause, which he had a handy little mnemonic for: SEX.
1. S - a Secular purpose for the law is required
2. E - the primary Effect must be neither to advance nor inhibit religion, and
3. X - there must not be eXcessive government entanglement with religion.
In typing up my notes later I tried to come up with a way to associate sex with the establishment clause. Sadly, I realized that the professor had squandered the mnemonic on the wrong clause. Sex = free exercise!
However, I think there's still a link for the legitimate clause. It just came to me! AND it's actually appropriate for my feelings towards the bar: Fuck the Establishment.
That's right, New York bar examiners - I'm talking to you.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Words and what they do NOT mean: What I have learned about NY Practice and Procedure after 10+ hrs of Barbri lectures
So I am taking the bar this summer. Somehow after 3 years of law school this has snuck up on me. And you know what that means? This is probably going to be one of the best summers of my life... if you measure "best" in terms of levels of crazy (least crazy being the least fun, obviously). I do happen to find humor in the crazy, so I figured that even if I am able to memorize very little of this stuff and live in constant fear of failure, I can at least stay semi-entertained by keeping some notes on the process! And so, I present the first of what will be hopefully many musings on bar review. Consider yourself one step closer to your OWN admission to the bar...
Replevin – does this actually sound like Rumpelstiltskin? Not at all. And yet that is all I can think about when I hear it. A selfish gnome creature who steals babies. Not “an order to seize chattel in an action to recover the chattel.” Though maybe we can think of the stolen babies as chattel. And while we’re on words that sound funny: chattel?!? Like cattle, but chattel can be cattle OR pens OR my bike. Maybe like cattle + chair = chattel. Both are chattel. Too bad I didn’t need help memorizing that one!
Garnishee – this is a third person who holds a defendant’s property interest or owes a debt to the defenant. But in MY world a garnishee is a cross between a banshee and spring of parsley. Maybe I should just picture the garnishee being a banshee who is holding the defendant’s parsley till judgment is made??? But the classic garnishee is a bank. So maybe this banshee is chilling in Bank of America. Yessss. Done.
Impoundment – and all this time I though that when a car was “impounded” it was literally pounded in/crushed. Whoops. Turns out impoundment happens when a sheriff seizes your chattel and retains custody of it, in order to insure enforcement of a judgment awarding possession of your chattel to the plaintiff. The dictionary also says that you can “impound” an animal, by “shutting up” in a pound or shelter. Now I am really glad I know that impound does not mean crush flat. Poor stray kittens!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
